Reluctant

Oct. 25th, 2008 08:35 pm
lincolnish: (knockin' up toenay)
[personal profile] lincolnish
You know who is a great man? Elvis. I say is because despite what many of you say, the King is not dead. He's hanging out in Mexico buying Cadillacs with his homie Tupac. Wut wut.

Before his alleged death Elvis famously sang that "fools rush in". I've done my share of rushing. Rushing for my frat in college, rushing the quarterback when I played football, rushing to get the last can of Pringles at the supermarket (once you pop, the fun don't stop!) but one thing I definite don't rush into is the gay.

Ok, so yeah, maybe I have a beautiful baby 20 year old girl, and maybe she was conceived one night while myself, Tony Stark, sea foam green mist, and a giant bottle of tequila (I ate the worm!) were in the same room. Whatever. There was a girl there too. Maria the room service housekeeper brought us wonderfully fluffy towels. Not that we needed them.

I'm the exception the proves the rule. I'm here to tell the world that yes Virginia, a girl can have two hetero daddies. How can you look at this piece of man meat and not think hot and sweaty man-woman love that smells like science and cash?

Um. He looks like a drug dealer there. Maybe this? Or this?

Tony, stop looking so gay, it's ruining my argument.

Better yet, just look at me. I'm the one who brought sexy back anyway. Patriotic AND manly! What more could you ask for? Nothing, except maybe a cigarette after a round of hot hot lovin'.

OOC: Muses referred to are [personal profile] aestark and [profile] xaxayayana  who are fantastic enough to be my partners in crime with all this silliness.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aestark.livejournal.com
Better yet stop finding gay photos of me.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
It's easy to do when you're so homo.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aestark.livejournal.com
Really? Considering you put all the effort into Googling me...

Date: 2008-10-25 09:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
When you're such a publicly gay figure, that's what turns up in the image results. When did you replace RuPaul's status as an icon?

Date: 2008-10-25 09:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aestark.livejournal.com
After Roy Horn's tiger incident. I think you've confused the word "gay" with being eccentric with unlimited resources.

I gave you more credit than that.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
Wearing bras with drag queens crosses the eccentricity line and you know it.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aestark.livejournal.com
It's called a fundraising benefit.

Date: 2008-10-25 10:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
Haven't you heard of a silent auction?

Date: 2008-10-25 10:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aestark.livejournal.com
I think my grandfather went to those.

Date: 2008-10-25 10:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
They're for classy people.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xaxayayana.livejournal.com
...Let's just say I feel very conflicted and confused about the feelings I'm feeling right now.

Date: 2008-10-25 09:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
Why is that, babycakes-sugarmuffin?

Date: 2008-10-25 09:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
Are you going to be ok? Does Daddy need to get you a popsicle?

Date: 2008-10-25 10:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xaxayayana.livejournal.com
Yes. I would love for you to give me your popsile to suck on.

Date: 2008-10-25 10:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-colbert.livejournal.com
Xaxa, if you mean anything other than a frozen tasty cherry flavored confection, then that is entirely inappropriate and you have Remus for that.

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lincolnish: (Default)
Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA

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